Disintegrate
rateTuesday, July 15, 2008Hey guys, oh well. So yeah, i just finished the last and final entry of my journal. And im possibly, giving it tomorrow. And don't worry guys, even if it dosent turn out ok, the journey here. Its been a learning experience for me, and im already prepared for the worst. So no harm done, im gonna be fine. But yeah, im still sticking to my original plan, im not letting you guys read my final journal entry, which is the longest i've written ever. But, change of plans on the second part. I MAY CONSIDER, emphasis on the MAY CONSIDER. Letting you guys know what happened in the end, but its just gonna be a simple yes or no. AND AGAIN, EMPHASIS ON THE MAY CONSIDER.Alright, anyway i bought my A3 paper and all the materials i need for my poster. So i can get started already.Im in no mood to blog now really, im feeling freaking tired for some reason. And, my mind's bursting, i want to scream but i can't. And tomorrow quite possibly, would be the big day. I think, Ms Soo, made the "no need to pass journal this week" arrangement, for my sake or something. So thank you to her, and the biggest thank you, would be that she gets to find out what happened, and read the entry.I want to scream, i want to sleep, i want to do so many things, i want to get this over, I want time to just stop and finally, i want chocolate milk.Tomorrows the big day, be cheering for me yes?And here marks the end of a 11 week journey.DarrenMonday, July 14, 2008You know, i realised something, i can pretty much sum up my life in sort of like a equation, ok maybe not a equation, but something like a chain or something. Lemme show you guys.Birth > Bad Influences > Suckiness > Rock Bottom > Guilt > Present/FutureYou guys just have to fit in the stuff which happened in between and you'll realise how much sense it makes.Today's picture, first of all, for those who think its a mess of colour and fail to read the small text, you fail. Its a phoenix basically, and yeah, ill leave it to you guys to guess the meaning and such, think i'll link it to the short poem i always make.I didnt attend school today, yeah.I pray for strength and many other things, including the will to hold back tears. I know its been one heck of a journey already, and with the finish line in sight, its only going to get more emotional and hard for me to pen down. People take more than 14 weeks for this type of thing, in fact some even take a year or two. But, Miss Soo gave me 14 weeks, and i gave myself 14 weeks. So to heck with it, whether it turns out alright or not, the journey alone has already been more than enough for me.For all those that give a f**k about my life and everything thats happening, yeah, im giving you advance warning now. So you won't be sad later. You won't get to read my last two entries, which are basically confidential. And i won't be telling you what happened at the end of it, regardless of what happened. No use trying to persuade me to change my mind, because its already made up. If you really were my friends, you would understand my position and where im coming from.I need A3 sized paper, i need more time for everything, i need to get a life. Whee for gay ass ICA's like designing a print ad for Brand's Chicken Essence which no one drinks anyway. Ill make a emo ad, i promise, black and white, and satanic symbols. Ill get Slipknot to sponsor Brand's Chicken Essence, and have them say "Hell, this makes kicking God's ass a lot more sweeter."Gotta go now, i wana start the basic design and concept of my ad, and if you bought what i said above, you really are dumber than Gnomes. At least Gnomes have Escape Artist! This is no indication of an insult to Marion. Oh wait, Gnomes are pretty smart, maybe Troggs then.Reborn, out of the ashes of my past.DarrenLabels: Epic, Equations, Phoenix, Poems, RandomSunday, July 13, 2008Alright, i've been getting some feedback that my blog's getting a bit retarded and shit like that. Well, i don't know about retarded, i mean, i thought that was a pretty fun game, but no one wanted to play really, cept Julian. So ill try to mix things up a bit, be a little bit insane at times, and moderately serious at times too.Right, picture above, it looks some awesome. It's like the perfect setting, and two lovers looking into each others eyes, and they say those three words. And i believe, they could feel time stopping, and they could hold each other in their arms for an eternity. Sappy stuff yeah? But, i mean, its a fantasy, and they ain't no hay fields in S'pore, so its a pity i guess.Summing up weekend, had a tipoff that Code Of Ethics was due this week. So i actually rushed it, and i was halfway through, then i decided to call Kenji to double check, and guess what, it appears it's not due this week, complete waste of my time. And i forgot to buy my A3 size paper for my poster, so that sucks too. My mum had friends over yesterday, like 10 of them. And some of them brought their kids, so heres a example of a conversation.Me (Attempting to keep silent) and Girl (Who likes to talk to people)Girl: How old are you?Me: Older than you for sure.Girl: Like how old? I'm 6 and a half right now.Me: Im like double that. And add 4Girl: So how old?Me: Double of your age? And add 4?Girl: I haven't learnt multiplication yet. *Laughs to herself*Me: Eh, what kind of stupid school is that?Girl: Its a good school, but im only in primary one.Me: Don't you learn stuff like 6.5 X 2 in primary one?Girl: Haven't learnt decimals either.Me: LOL, im 17 this yearGirl: So 6.5 X 2 is 17?Me: *Controls laughter and continues playing PSP*Lol, cool conversation yes?I predict, another killer week. With like shit due every single day, and BPS results on wednesday or thursday, and possible test results from DFVP and Creativity.MLG Arena tourney, this time round, teams seem more retarded than usual. With gays coming up with lineups like triple rogue or triple mage. And putting holy paladins in over resto dr00ds? EPIC fail.So, finally and most importantly. The deadline. For all of you guys who have actually been following my progress over the last couple of months, you should know how much effort and time i've put in. For all of you who don't know what im talking about, you can try asking me, and if i think you're worthy, i shall let you in on the shit im planning. So its technically, less than a month from now, countdown really starts now guys. Wish me all the best!Free from this world, here for the last time,Oceans collide inside of us all,Believe who we are,The phoenix will guide us.Just a few more weeks, and ill step into the blinding light, and see that beautiful smile once again.DarrenFriday, July 11, 2008k, i am here to blog again. Therefore, yes, i will have many opinions about stuff. And my opinions are mine, but I am glad for constructive criticism.kay, first things first, im feeling so effing lethargic, feel like sleeping, yet i don't want too. Maybe ill take a short nap after this.Moving on, we should wrestle more in the library, because theres air con, and because the ground absorbs some of the impact when i throw you guys to the floor.Don't ever try making Ads for Singtel, is so f**king stupid, i wanted to cry. All we came up with at the end of it was basically what we had at the beginning, nothing. BUT BUT BUT, I had a awesome idea, but no one else thought it was awesome. Basically a dog, running, while he's on fire, has to be the Starhub dog though, since it is our opponent. And the thought bubble is there saying "DAMM, I should have gone with Singtel instead."K, time for my epiczsz challenge, i issue this to anyone who plays WoW, or anyone who thinks they can do it. I bet you, that i cans relate WoW to real life, just need to state 10 points on why real life is different from WoW. Its a funny challenge, because i did it just now, and it was effing funny, so if you want, post it on your blog, and tag me to see it. No prize, unless you don't play WoW and get all ten. I can tell if you got help (:k lol, please try, its fun, because i will provides imba answers.now times for sleep, go try my challenge, I WANT KENJI AND BEZNER TO DO IT, because you guys try to OPPOSE ME, so yeah do it. And Marion the Level 70 Gnome Mage can try it too, after which you might want to try farming for a epic mount, you move way too slowly xDDarrenThursday, July 10, 2008k, first and foremost, sincerest apologies to Manfred, might have gone a bit overboard, hope its all cool, and yeah, i was just playing, i would never want to kill you would I?Heroes of Our Time, new Dragonforce single, worth a listen i guess. They mixed things up a little, still making their awesome and addictive riffs and distortions which make them what they are. Drum seems a wee bit faster, guitar seems the same, soloes still rip my mind apart though. Not quite epic, but almost there.New shit about Dragonforce1) Herman Li can play without even touching the guitar (meaning picking)2) They have new signature guitars, which are super cool. (All Ibanez)3) The new single, is harder than Through The Fire and Flames, its faster and the beat is more randomised, and a lot of whammy and distortion is involved.4) Drummer's drumset is bigger than before5) Their hair is longer, not surprising.6) Bassist likes to jump around a lot more than usual.Im hooked on Rock You Like a Hurricane, by the Scorpions. Awesome song, addicitive riffs, and awesome frontman.K, some bands can't cover Iron Maiden songs. Good example would be Machine Head. Original Maiden > Stupid cover bands.And back to reality, School today, was ok i guess. I actually did some stuff in Marketing, and yeah Scriptwriting was fun, till she started the normal lesson which became boring and basically draining my soul away. Think, 400,000 shadow damage over like 10 mins, unresistable. Just like Illidan except you can't run from this one xDAND most importantly, we watched An Inconvenient Truth, which i honestly hope, would change the mindset of everyone, but i don't think that would happen. And no, i do not believe in stupid conspiracy theories, which involve weather machines and world domination.Arguements test tomorrow, im hitting the notes, GP notes to be precise, i heard its very similar, the both of them. I <3 Starbucks FOREVER, Coffee Bean should honestly, burn in hell. No offence to the people who work there or consume their products, but please CONVERT! Its never too late!K, notes time, and i need some sleep afterwards.Indifference with a twist, hiding in the shadow of guilt.DarrenWednesday, July 9, 20081. Who was the person who last called you, and why?Think Jiali called me? In the morning, to check if i was collecting the notes and stuff.2. Do you ever turn your cell phone off?Lol, never.3. What happened at 10.00am today?Listening to Ipod in D4064. When did you last cry?A week ago.5. What is your favourite thing to eat with peanut butter?Bread i guess, hot chocolate for the drink.6. What do you want in your life right now?Good grades, some cash, and you know what else.7. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood?I usually forget my umbrella so i end up using my books and stuff.8. What's your favourite thing to do before you go to bed?Heavy metal headbanging music, and read some books.9. What are you wearing right now?White Camel Active Tee, and some random shorts.10. What does the nicest text message in your inbox say?Erm, can't be disclosed unfortunately.11. Do you tend to make a relationship complicated?Nah, not a fan of complicated stuff, especially relationships. Stick with simple and plain.12. Are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone?Erm nope.13. What was the last movie you caught?Bowling for Columbine14. What are you proud of?Many things, too many to list out.15. What does the oldest text message in your inbox say?Quote, "I don't have a paper tomorrow, gonna start work now, was slacking away."16. What was the last song you sang out loud?Welcome to the Jungle by Guns N' Roses17. Do you have any nicknames? What are they?Many actually, Dodo's one the more famous ones18. What does the last text message you received say?Quote, "In secondary school? No way! I was never house cap! Ah, nvm. Talk tmr morning. Have chores. See ya!"19. What time did you go to bed last night?10+ i think.20. What makes you happy?Holidays, good friends, awesome party.21. Who gives you the best advice?Good friends, parents, occasionally my brain22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can?Never tried, but i would.23. Who did you talk to on the phone last night?No one.24. Is anything bugging you right now?Projects and shit like that.25. What/Who was the last thing/person that made you laugh?Husayn, stupid gay ass jump and clap shit.26. Do you wear toe socks?Wth? Gay socks? Ask Kenji.27. Who was the last person you missed a call from?Husayn, long while back.28. What's your favourite fruit?Mangoes29. What annoys you most in a person?Gays, irritants, faggots, being insensitive, and the list goes on30. What do you admire most in a person?Honesty, kindness from the heart.31. Have you ever done cocaine?Hell no.32. What is the colour of your room?White.33. Would you kill someone you hate for a billion dollars?Hell yes, if i don't get caught.34. Do you believe in the saying 'talk is cheap'?Yes indeed.35. Who was the last person to lay on your bed?Me.36. Who was the last person to e-mail you?Manfred37. Did anyone see the last person you kissed?My dog? I think my family saw.38. Do you have a life?Yes.39. Have you ever thought someone died when they really didn't?Yes, many times.40. What is the reason behind your profile song?No gay ass profile song which irritates people who might not like it.41. Who was the last person you saw in your dreams?Kenny from South Park42. Last time you smiled?A few seconds back.43. Have you changed this year?I like to believe so.44. What are you listening to right now?Psychosocial by Slipknot45. Are you talking to someone while you're doing this?Nope.46. Do you walk with your eyes open or closed?Lets just say i don't sleepwalk.47. Is there a quote you live by?'Be the change you want to see in the world.'48. Do you want someone you can't have?Yeah i guess, or at least i believe so.49. Have you ever played an instrument?Drums, guitar, recorder, a tiny bit of piano.50. What was the worst idea you've had in this week?To try and throw Husayn off the fourth floor.51. What were you doing last night at 11.00pm?Sleeping probably52. Are you happy with your love life right now?Being single for now is alright with me53. Do you like receiving flowers?As long as it isn't from a guy.54. Are you gay?God no, go find Kenji under my links, and you'll see gay-ness.55. Who are the people who always make you laugh?Husayn, Jiali, Markus, Sebastian, and many others i guess.56. Do you speak another language other than English?Im proficient in Chinese.57. Are you blonde?Black hair.58. What's your middle name?F**k middle names.59. What are you doing tomorrow?Going to school, getting shit done, come home.60. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?Either a pro gamer, or a guitarist.61. Who will you choose to die with?No one, don't wana drag anyone down with me.62. Where have you been today?School, busstop, home.63. What game do you play often?WoW, WC3. these 2 i guess.64. Who are you missing right now?No one actually.65. If you were to choose between friends and love, who will you choose?Who says you can't have friendships without love?66. What are you doing right now?Doing this, listening to music and eating chocolate.67. Which primary school are you from?Rosyth Primary.68. Name 3 colours that you like.Black, white and pale blue.69. Name three of your favourite fashion designers.Hell? I don't know any.70. What is life to you?Life = Do all the shit you want before you die or you'll regret it somehow.71. If you have something troubling you, what will you do?Ask people, if they give me shit answers, i just ignore it.72. Who did you last chat with in MSN today?Priscilla73. Who do you admire most?Hmm, tough. Slash would be good, Hendrix. Awesome guitarists.74. Which month are you born in?May75. What are your favourite movies?LOTR Trilogy, period.76. What is the time now?7.55pm Wednesday.77. Where are you now?In my room.78. What colour did you use to dye your hair?Dyed it black once.79. Why are you doing this test?Cause theres nothing better to do.80. What do you do when you're moody?Listen to music, maybe play some guitar.81. At which age do you wish to get married?Not thinking about marriage for now.82. Which is more important to you, family or friends?I find both equally important.83. Do you think you have enough confidence?I think i do. sometimes.84. Who is the person you trust the most?A good friend, won't disclose name85. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after a rain?Yeah, seen it before.86. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?School's closed forever, no more education.87. What is your goal for this year?Good grades, finish up journal.88. Do you believe in eternal love?Nah, it dosen't exist.89. What feeling do you love most?Owning noobs, especially the ones who scream.90. Do you believe in global warming?110% YES.91. What feeling do you hate the most?Guilt, no way to change this.92. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?Mm yeah, i do.93. Do you believe in God?Nah, Slipknot FTW.94. Who cares for you the most?My friends and family i suppose.95. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?Making the right choices every single day.96. What'll you bring when you fight?Quote Charlene, 'Myself'97. What have you regretted doing in your whole life?Things i shall not mention.98. Coffee or tea?Coffee. Starbucks please.99. What would you do if your significant other cheated on you?Kill the other guy, or hurt him, then break up.100. What do you want now?More chocolate please.K imba post over.Tuesday, July 8, 2008k i made a mistake, it was 5B sticks, not 3B, so yeah.anyway, this is gonna be a real short post, i gotta study for DFVP test tomorrow.Bowling For Columbine is the kewl beans.AND, stupid ass Creativity module ripped off JC GP (General Paper), so i have to borrow notes and study for it, soooooooooo stupid.And i shall stop posting "pictures" of Kenji from now on, because he thinks and assumes its stupid and gay, so fine, i shall stop.And, Marion, i swear i shall dedicate a post specially for you, i got your picture and all. Thats for trying to make me impotent.My bed and notes beckon, hope i don't fall asleep while doing it, for various reasons. Peace and happiness guys, looks like we all need it. Study hard for DFVP! Husayn, make sure you don't oversleep, i don't want a groggy opponent at Sentosa Mania 08'My life's been incomplete i guess, and a complete mess. You patched it up.Darren
